9 Ways To Be More Secure in Life

Dr. Ankit Sharma, PhD

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Ways To Be More Secure in Life

Everyone has moments of insecurity, and that’s OK! Nevertheless, while security is a fundamental human need, it becomes much more crucial in unpredictable times like these. However, how can you feel more confident? You should know that there are Ways to be More Secure.

First of all, admitting that we may benefit from a little insecurity is a good idea since it keeps us motivated. But being insecure is only beneficial in moderation; living a life where you continually feel unsafe or uneasy will not make you happy.

How To Be More Secure

1. Know You’re Not Doing This Alone

Not feeling alone is one of the Ways to be More Secure. We may believe that no one is supporting us and that the whole world is against us when we are feeling uneasy. However, that is untrue; all you need to do is reach out and locate your haven, and someone will always be there to support you.

It may be a member of your family, a friend, or your partner. If you’re having trouble with a particular issue that’s making you feel insecure, consider getting assistance from a support group or a counsellor—either in-person or virtually—if your connections don’t feel safe right now.

Remember that it’s very common to have moments of insecurity, so don’t be scared to display your sensitive side. However, keep in mind that people have the freedom to refuse your request, just as you have the right to seek it out. It is thus a good idea to maintain several helpful partnerships.

2. Practice Self-Compassion

Your mental health may be impacted by the negative self-talk you could have while you’re feeling uneasy. Treat yourself with kindness and gradually allow your inner power to surface.

Since overcoming uncertainty is a delicate process, you may want to go slowly and give yourself credit for what you’ve accomplished. Examine the facts and consider whether the negative self-talk you’re engaging in is indeed accurate to counteract it. Self-compassion is beneficial and one of the Ways to be Secure.

3. Notice Your Body Language

Your thoughts will follow your confident demeanour. This doesn’t mean you have to sport a complete makeup look or put on your nicest outfit, but if it gives you greater confidence, then go for it. Changing one’s posture is often sufficient.

We often shrink ourselves when we’re insecure; we hunch our backs, droop our shoulders, and drop our heads. Your demeanour might be shy and reserved or tense and agitated, depending on your nature. These are the kinds of activities we usually do. We often find ourselves typing a non-contentious letter to confrontational parents at work with our heads bent protectively over the keyboard.

We ask you to perform the following if you identify with yourself in this situation—you could even be slouching your shoulders right now:

  • Set your back erect.
  • Reposition your shoulders.
  • Raising your chin, look straight ahead or establish eye contact.

What is the sensation? Whenever you feel uneasy, try to adjust your posture. It will not only help you feel more certain and self-assured, but it will also help others to believe it. This is also supported by scientific evidence.

According to research, power posing, or striking wide-open, commanding positions for only one minute, reduces the stress hormone cortisol and raises risk tolerance and sensations of authority.

4. Develop Social Skills

Developing social skills is one of the Ways to be More Secure. Sometimes a lack of social skills is correlated with feelings of insecurity. You can, however, acquire people skills. You’ll feel more confident in yourself with other people the more socially proficient you are.

It is recommended that abilities such as maintaining eye contact and speaking clearly be developed. When you’re among other people, pay attention to your body language and make an effort to approach social situations with positivity.

Recall that developing more self-assurance and ease in social settings will need some practice. Try to be kind and patient with yourself, acknowledging the effort you are putting into overcoming your insecurities.

5. Increase Your Passion-Driven Activities

Being skilled at something we enjoy gives us a sense of accomplishment and capability. It’s a good idea to remind yourself of your strengths when you’re feeling uneasy about anything in your life. Whether you like to exercise, play golf, knit, or calligraphy is irrelevant.

Having a regular or leisure activity that boosts your self-esteem and confidence in your abilities is crucial. If you like it, just watching a movie or reading a book might be the solution.

Taking up a new activity is also a great way to feel successful and acquire new abilities. In this situation, it’s critical to keep in mind that success requires establishing smaller objectives and that perfection takes time.

6. Ask Questions

If nervousness prevents you from making a choice, pose a series of questions to yourself that will help you determine what is best for you. Let’s assume you are thinking of giving up your work, ending your relationship, or living a nomadic lifestyle.

First of all, if you weren’t scared to show vulnerability, how would you respond? Insecurity may often prevent us from even thinking about our real, heartfelt wants. Thus, now is your chance to tear down that barrier.

What is preventing you from making this choice, to ask a second question? If your insecurities about pursuing your genuine interest in joining a nudist colony stem from your Aunt Karen’s criticism of you, then you’re wearing clothing for a pretty pathetic reason, don’t you think?

Third question: How would this decision benefit me? Write out exactly how the choice might help or hurt you. If at all possible, do so. It’s a useful (and brief) reality check to see whether you’re delaying doing something healthy for yourself out of a desire to be comfortable.

Final Question: Will it matter whether I do what I want to accomplish now, tomorrow, next month, next year, or ten years from now? Even if you’re hesitant to enrol in graduate school to become a librarian today, you know that putting off this decision would be a mistake and that you would be betraying yourself in the long run.

7. Have Optimistic Outlook

Insecurities often start as a result of overall negativity in our lives, much like a snowball rolling down your hill as it gains size and velocity from one mishap after another.

Many things might indeed go wrong at once, yet there are always reasons to be happy and hopeful. Even whether they are little pleasures like finally being able to binge-watch the latest season of The Crown on Netflix or something as fundamental as having a roof over your head and food on the table.

Taking note of the positive aspects also aids in bringing attention to the aspects that we can manage. By using Netflix, you can take control of your entertainment even if you may not currently have control over your living environment.

Even in the event of a worldwide epidemic causing havoc outside, owning a house means having a secure haven that you can furnish and stock with your favourite items.

8. Practice Gratitude

Practicing gratitude is one of the Ways to be Secure and is not simply a trendy phrase. Commence by appreciating all of your life’s blessings, no matter how little. By doing this, you begin to see plenty instead of scarcity.

For example, be grateful for a nice dinner, a beautiful day, or a friend who is encouraging. By writing down the things you have every day to be thankful for, you develop an attitude that acknowledges and values the goodness and stability that are already in your life.

Maintain a thankfulness notebook to put this into practice. Write down three things for which you are grateful every day. These might be anything from little joys to noteworthy accomplishments.

This practice eventually raises your feeling of security and well-being in general. Recall that appreciation is like a muscle: the more you use it, the more powerful it grows in influencing how secure and content you feel in life.

9. Boost Your Social Networks

Our connections are typically the source of our sense of security. Having strong social ties gives one a sense of support and belonging, which are essential components of feeling safe.

Evaluate the state of your relationships and take action to make them stronger. This may include arranging frequent get-togethers with family members or contacting a buddy you haven’t talked to in a long time.

Additionally, don’t be afraid to establish new relationships. Become a member of online forums, clubs, or organizations that share your interests. Participating in social events enhances your feeling of identification and belonging while also broadening your social network.

Recall that what matters is the quality of these friendships, not the quantity of them. Having strong, meaningful relationships may greatly increase your sense of security in an uncertain environment.

Why Do We Feel Insecure?

All of that being said, it’s common to have occasional feelings of insecurity. Moving to a new place, starting a new relationship, or starting a new career are all significant life changes, and it’s natural to feel a bit uneasy.

Getting used to new environments and circumstances takes time. At the slightest hint of uncertainty, you shouldn’t freak out, even if everything is going well. Feeling uneasy from time to time is rather common and is all part of the amazing and diverse experience of being a person. Furthermore, pleasure isn’t always found within your secure bubble.

Self-honesty also benefits from insecurity as nobody is flawless and insecurity often serves as the catalyst for personal development. Although it’s not impossible, progress is quite improbable if you believe you’re already competent in every area. A little insecurity is not harmful but too much of it can cause problems. There are Ways to be More Secure.


Q: What psychology underlies feelings of insecurity?

A: Insecurity is defined by the American Psychological Association as a sense of inadequacy and an incapacity to cope. Individuals who experience insecurity lack confidence and worry about their capacity to succeed in relationships and their ambitions.

Q: From whence do insecurities originate?

A: A sense of vulnerability or doubt about oneself or one’s skills is called insecurity. Lack of confidence or a fear of failing, being rejected, or receiving negative feedback from others are common characteristics. Many factors, including early experiences, societal conditioning, and traumatic events in the past, might contribute to insecurity.

Q: Do insecurities disappear?

A: For many people, insecurities may be overcome before they have a negative, long-lasting effect. However, the uncertainty and unfavourable emotions felt while dealing with generalized uneasiness for an extended period may have a major impact on life.

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