Everyone has witnessed it: a friend or acquaintance enters a relationship & quickly loses all resemblance to themselves. They behave differently, wear different clothing, & sometimes even speak differently. The core of who they were has been lost, even though the changes may not be negative in & of themselves. They simply aren’t themselves anymore. If you are experiencing similar things, there are Ways to Avoid Losing Yourself.
Nobody is immune to losing pieces of themselves in a relationship; regardless of how resilient or independent you are, it can happen to anybody. The majority of us are guilty of doing this at some point.
We occasionally don’t only lose sight of who we are. Forcing the ideal match, we change who we are & combine our identity with our spouse’s. Sometimes, it happens because we try very hard to be accommodating & want to please.
Stop Losing Yourself Following These Ways
1. Don’t Always Replace ‘I’ With ‘We’
Social media updates, news stories on group entities like “Kimye,” and a variety of other methods are being used to publicize “We.”
Your personal connection & vocabulary will inevitably be affected by the push to unite into a “we.” The phrase “I like that movie” is changed to “we like that movie,” & somewhere along the line, your opinions and preferences are forgotten.
While using the word “we” excessively might be a doorway to unhealthful relationship territory, it does make sense in specific circumstances. Check your wording, & stop using “we” when you should be using “I.”
You should voice your opinions since you are an autonomous individual. It is the best method for Ways to Avoid Losing Yourself.
2. Prioritize Yourself
Even when you’re in a relationship, self-care is crucial & one of the vital Ways to Avoid Losing Yourself. In other words, you’re still taking care of yourself. Self-care might take the shape of continuing to pursue your interests, being committed to your objectives, & doing the things you find enjoyable.
Do not depend on another individual to make you happy. You’ll discover that you two love spending time together & that you have a lot in common. It is amazing!
By being loyal to who you are & what you love, you must still meet your own needs. Just because we find fulfillment in our romantic relationships does not mean we will not ultimately need to find satisfaction in other aspects of our lives.
3. Set Healthy Boundaries
You can keep your sense of self by setting boundaries—your identity & who you are protected. Just make sure you’re clear about your boundaries with your spouse so they can respect them.
You can feel more resilient, assured, and in control of both yourself & your relationship when you have healthy boundaries. You’ll experience the complete opposite if you don’t have any boundaries! You’ll feel depleted, worn out, & somewhat discouraged.
In a partnership, having boundaries is wholly normal. It’s acceptable that everyone has things they will & won’t put up with from others. You shouldn’t be forced to give up your limits just because someone asks you to.
4. Socialize Regularly with Loved Ones
It’s crucial to integrate your significant other into your social circle & introduce them to the people who are key in your life, but it’s also essential to preserve these other ties on your own. And let’s face it, the atmosphere is different when your S.O. is around.
These unique individuals acquainted with you before your relationship will support your efforts to be loyal to yourself. Set aside time to meet with them alone frequently.
Just because you’re in a committed relationship doesn’t imply you should ignore your other meaningful connections. If your partner always tags along when you meet them, it’s one of the Signs You’re Losing Yourself.
5. Don’t Stop Enjoying Things You Love
It mainly happens when you are in a relationship with someone with different tastes. You no longer play your favorite PC games as you were told to ‘grow up’. You can’t watch Superhero movies without being judged as your partner thinks these are for kids.
Let your partner know the things they think to be ‘awkward’ or ‘odd’ is a part of your choice. Those are the things you love. Those things define you.
If they want to modify you, things may fail to end well. If blaring tracks of ‘Green Day’ give them a headache, you will grab your earphones & enjoy it yourself while they enjoy ‘Neil Diamond’. But forcing you to stop listening to rock is a wrong move.
6. Be True To Yourself
Don’t strive to be someone you’re not by changing who you are. Your partner may love football while you loathe them. It is not applicable in this situation to “fake it ’til you make it.”
Trying to behave in a way that you believe they want you to is not in your best interest. Tell your lover the truth about who you are & yourself.
If you have to watch sporting events every day & wear a shirt for a team you don’t even recognize, you’ll wind up pretending to be someone you’re not, & you’ll probably be really unhappy. Therefore, being yourself is one of the Ways to Avoid Losing Yourself.
7. Identify Yourself
The moment to declare, “OK, I’m complete,” is not when you meet a mate & commit to a relationship. The necessity to concentrate on & understand oneself has passed.
On the contrary, discovering new things about yourself & who you want to be as a partner is an ongoing process that should be continued even when you’re in a relationship.
Make time in your relationship for “me” time so that you may think about your wants & wellness. Include it in your self-care routine, & if you still need to establish a self-care habit, do it now. The definition of a relationship is “the way two people are connected,” not how two people become one.
To have a robust and enduring relationship, you should never have to compromise who you are. The word “relationship” includes two “I”s, and each is crucial. Every connection must consist of your entire self; otherwise, it isn’t real. If you can’t identify yourself, it is one of the Signs You’re Losing Yourself.
We concur that maintaining a good relationship requires open, sincere, & caring communication. Be confident in expressing your feelings to your spouse.
Don’t be scared to speak out if you feel like losing yourself in the relationship. You & your spouse could come up with fun things to do separately & encourage one another to come up with fun things to do independently.
Being honest with your spouse might be frightening since you don’t know how they’ll respond & you don’t want to offend them. However, if they genuinely care about you, they will help you with your needs in the same proportion as you help them.
Signs You Are Losing Yourself in a Relationship
In a relationship, people often lose themselves. That is not healthy for any relationship. However, there are Ways to Avoid Losing Yourself. If you notice these signs, be confident & take proper steps:
- Depleted confidence.
- Alienation from friends & family.
- Compromising internal values.
- No idea about personal goals.
- Limited decision-making.
- Being a subject to manipulation & dominance.
- Emotional dependence.
- Being a subject to emotional abuse.
- You don’t prioritize any “me” time.
- You have no social life.
- Your partner is your only focus.
- Your opinions are the mirror of your partner’s opinion.
- You question your feelings.
- Your relationship lacks boundaries.
- You can’t say ‘no’ to your partner.
- You’re the only one who compromises.
Q: Is losing yourself in a relationship a sign of a toxic relationship?
A: A toxic relationship brings many negatives, but losing yourself in a relationship is equally unhealthy.
Q: My partner always tries to dominate me; what to do?
A: Tell your partner trying to dominate anyone in a relationship is unhealthy & can damage the relationship.
Q: I really miss my single days. Is it bad?
A: Missing being single is one of the Signs You’re Losing Yourself. Talk it out with your partner.